Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Advertising on Beach Sloth

                Today on this old Blog I have a special announcement: I am offering advertising up to whoever is interested. By no means is this going to dramatically change much of anything. After a few years of pouring my heart and scroll into this fine invention I’m ready to take things to the next level. 

                Advertising is in a few forms. Anybody interested in advertising can feel free to contact me at the following address:


                I use that address exclusively for anything payment or Beach Sloth business related. That address proved to be infinitely helpful whenever I have sold T-shirts or chapbooks. Anybody can buy either of those things from me still. 

                T-shirts, Buttons, Etc. go here.
                Chapbooks go here.
                Patreon (NEW) go here.

                I offer a few things for advertising purposes. As the blog is now an increasingly smaller part of what I do I also offer other places to advertise:

                My Twitter
                My Tumblr

                My advertising efforts have already begun prior to this post. Nobody has noticed yet so I figured now would be a great time to take things to the next level. Whoever is interested in advertising through any of my online platforms can do so. Simply email me, let me know what you need, what sort of prices you would be willing to pay, and what kind of advertising you are hoping to do (music, literature, other products, etc.). 

                Thus far my advertising efforts have been pretty successful since they have reinforced rather than taken away from what I have already done. Beach Sloth is a huge passion project for me. I hope to continue doing exactly what I love doing on all platforms. This project has taken on a life of its own. My initial estimate for the length of Beach Sloth was a year, tops, maybe two years. Now it is close to entering its fourth year, hence my desire to try and make this more sustainable for me. 

                Note that I am going to continue this Blog for the indefinite future. There is no specific end in sight for this site. I want to continue doing this with the least amount of interruption possible. I am infinitely thankful for everything everyone has managed to do for me. I have received great support for this project which is why it has continued this long. 

                Whoever is interested in simply donating me money (through the kindness of their heart) can do so via my PayPal account: pleasepaybeachsloth@gmail.com I will continue to blog for you. That is a promise.

Thursday, October 15, 2015

Beach Sloth - It doesn't matter what you look like on the outside it’s what’s on the internet that counts 11.0

                Among the masterpieces of the world Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection is the best. Other forms of art are stupid compared to what Beach Sloth has effortlessly accomplished in his debut poetry publication. Writers yearn to truly navigate the depths of the human soul the way an anonymous dad sloth does with absolute ease. Throughout the collection Beach Sloth goes from hilarious to tragic in mere fractions of an inch. Of course this may be due to the font size but it is a grand testament to Beach Sloth’s powers as a highly blogging entity that his work appears to be perfected within these hallowed pages. 

                Trees give their lives for books but usually those books are not as good as Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection. Few things can be. Beach Sloth has for years, nigh decades, supported people. His credo of “Support Each Other” can be felt throughout the surprising debut poetry collection. At times dark and touching Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection takes a different approach from his actual blogging material. Yes the playfulness is still there. Yet there is specific commentary on some of the people that Beach Sloth truly cares for both people he has encountered and people he grew up with. For limiting the collection to random strangers, while fitting his blog’s aesthetic, is thrown aside for a more personal approach. 

                What is most interesting about Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection is the dearth of sloths. Throughout the collection Beach Sloth fails to mention much in the way of actual sloths. Maybe this is because Beach Sloth feels it is too painful to reflect upon growing up in a human’s world as a mere sloth covered in algae hanging off of trees. Currently few are interested in the secret lives of sloths excluding the valiant efforts of a select few biochemists who realize that sloth algae could provide a plethora of life-extending and life-improving pharmaceuticals. 

                Until such time as scientists are able to cure common ailments using sloth back algae, there is Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection. Sure maybe Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection will be unable to cure the common cold but it can improve the spirit and isn’t that just as good, if not better? There is a lot of harshness in life a lot of people who feel like doing it alone. Life does not need to be that way. People are social creatures and with Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection people will feel closer together. And that is better than any medicine. 

                Go HERE to learn more about the importance of Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection,how to order, and how to have a fun time in general. 

Note for Book Price: While I have a 'pay what you want' feature I would say that the minimum suggested price for the book is $13 US/Canada, $18 International (I figure I am going to be sending a lot of stuff internationally).

Monday, July 27, 2015

Beach Sloth is creating Blogs

                Beach Sloth is a project I created officially on July 27th, 2010. I love blogging about people. There is so much culture to explore and support. Ever since I began Beach Sloth I have not needed a TV for anything. My life has been fulfilled seeing what wonderful pieces of work made it online into my browsers, my emails, my PDFs, my videos, and my music. Honestly thanks to Beach Sloth I have been exposed to more culture than I could ever possibly wrap my arms around. 

                That is why I created a Patreon account. I could use a few sponsors to help me meet my monthly expenses which are pretty small. I live frugally. At this point I do not need much to survive since I have cut down what I consider my needs. What I do know that I need, what I am passionate about, is all the wonderful people I have reviewed on this blog. Countless individuals that I have been fortunate enough to meet have become incredibly close friends, the kinds of friends that I can confide in and treat just like those people I have met in person.

                Financial support for Beach Sloth gives me a reason to spend a greater amount of time on auxiliary aspects of the project. Already I have released an e-book through Amazon, a chapbook I printed myself, an album free for download, an e-book released for free through Peanut Gallery Press (which has been favorably mentioned by Dennis Cooper), and a book through Dig That Book Co. So I try to keep Beach Sloth as active as I possibly can. 

                Everything I create for the blog shall continue to be free. I have great plans for Beach Sloth, including an eventual full-length book, another full-length album offered free of charge, and smaller e-books and chapbooks. People who feel like contributing money to me via Patreon can do so right

                I also understand a lot of my readership cannot afford to support me via Patreon. My presence on Patreon will not change anything about what I can for the blog. All it means is if someone wants to support me financially outside of the usual avenues of:


pleasepaybeachsloth@gmail.com – my Paypal account, which has since become an MEME 

             Recently I have also decided to start a Fiverr account which basically expands what I do on a regular basis into new forms. If you are interested in my Fiverr work (want something written, shared, re-tweeted, etc.) you can go:


They can. It is that simple. Nothing else will change. I shall continue Beach Sloth, this passion project of mine, because I think that what I do is rewarding in ways outside of mere monetary concerns. My ultimate goal for Beach Sloth is to have it financially support me and a small group of writers I particularly like (I have people in mind for this). That is far away but with Patreon that can become considerably easier. Thank you for reading this and thank you for coming to my little corner of the universe. 

                Additionally I would like to thank everyone who has been able to support me on Patreon. It means more to me than I can possibly express.

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Flying Saucer Attack - Instrumentals 2015

Flying Saucer Attack are back to cover the world in feedback once again. After a fifteen year hiatus they, without warning, have returned. With the few snippets of “Instrumentals 2015” it appears they continue to be in fine form. For their unique blend of rural psychedelia (their words) has no peers. Usually even the most adherent of shoegaze bands managed to clean up their sound at some point. Nobody at Flying Saucer Attack ever believed in a cleaned up sound. Fiercely DIY, they recorded at home letting the lo-fi textures work as an integral part of their sound. 

A cult favorite (maybe because of the name, maybe because of the oddly inspiring feedback of the music) they went around the world playing their blissed-out music. With “Instrumentals 2015” it appears they have set their sights even more towards the stratosphere. The current piece they have presented “Instrumental 4” shows a bit of their dreamy/industrial vibe that they have perfected. Whereas some of their other ilk went towards the harsher realms, the massive sounds, theirs felt permanent, like there was a ceremony already ongoing and the listener happens to pop in right in the middle of things. Even their other piece "Instrumental 7" shows off their beloved patience guitar work. 

With such a long hiatus it can be a bit weird for a band to simply emerge out of nowhere and say “yes, we’re back doing the exact same thing”. However, Flying Saucer Attack was never a normal band. This might be their time to re-emerge from the shadows. Lately there has been a resurgence in that muddied pastoral sound, so they may find a way to expanded their devoted cult of fans. Here’s hoping. 

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

How To Distinguish Alligators from Crocodiles by Steve Roggenbuck

Steve Roggenbuck informs the viewer about the difference between an alligator and a crocodile. This is an important distinction to make in life, particularly those who live in areas where these fine creatures live, such as the New York City sewer system. Alligators typically look graceful as if they were drawn by animators. Crocodiles on the other hand are considerably tougher looking beasts. Interest in the alligator versus crocodile dilemma has plagued humanity since the beginning of time, so the view is a welcome addition to the world wide web. 

It is revealed that Steve Roggenbuck’s children pay him legit money to curse. Typically fathers are paid in monopoly money. Not Steve Roggenbuck, he makes the serious cash. Because Steve Roggenbuck’s children pay him to curse, he is able to make rent every single month of the year, except Christmas because Santa pays for that. The cursing has a greater purpose for Steve Roggenbuck for he uses a potty mouth for his potty, showing off his impressive stance on the toilet. Lounging is a great way to go to the bathroom. Judging from Steve Roggenbuck’s unique bathroom color scheme he is doing quite well indeed. 

Fathers are celebrated throughout the video right in time for Father’s Day. Steve Roggenbuck’s dad eats crumbs. This is typical of the trickle down economics first introduced by Ronald ‘Ronnie’ Reagan. Upon learning that America’s poor were starving Ronald Reagan stated “let them eat crumbs”. Ronald Reagan was not a compassionate conservative but rather a difficult person who failed to understand the suffering of the average American. Sadly America has not learned from the mistakes of Ronald Reagan but one day hopefully every Ronald Reagan decision will be discredited and thrown into the trash where it belongs. 

Light needs to shine on the darkness of the world. This happens every day and is called ‘the day’ or ‘daytime’ for short. Yes this is an important development. Before the sun came around things were darker. Fortunately even if the sun were to one day ‘stop’ there is artificial light ready to make things considerably better. Tech Blogs shine light on people too, but mostly because they are reading Tech Blogs from illuminated digital screens. 

1.1 miles per hour is a slow thing, a turtle is the slowest thing in the universe besides those other things. Steve Roggenbuck shows off his uncanny ability to care for the turtles of the world. 

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Electric Blue by Luis Silva

Trivia and references are a new form of language. Devoid of any kind of vulnerability, the trivia of the world keeps people protected. Emotional honesty, this is stuff that is lost with trivia. Knowledge helps boring people pretend they are interesting. With the vast intake of knowledge they do not have to experience much of anything. Instead they can simply opt out of the social norms of the world, choosing to simply give it their best while the trivia helps to flatten out any potential offense they might have. 

What makes this a dangerous approach is the trivia the references the search for deeper meaning only leads them to objects not to themselves. They remain blissfully unaware of anything having to do with humanity. Even their own lives are incredibly dull. Dullness is the least of their worries. By choosing to simply live in the references they can appear callous, even indifferent to the suffering of others. Cruelty within their personality reflects itself by letting them become people who are emotionally closed off from others. 

Late nights mean they can deal with people far less than they used to do. Gradually their friends recede like waves on a beach receding back into the ocean. Millions of fish in the sea and they are covered in a liquid required for life. These trivia and references enthusiasts pick weird but not too weird topics to interest themselves in as they are unable to form meaningful long term connections. With every year they become less and less interested in the world outside of their own self-created world. Such an approach is a terrifying prospect particularly for those who long before might have wanted relationships and deep meaningful connections. References, trivia, analysis of that information, it is not judgmental. It is the path chosen by those scared of serious commitment. Millions of people live that way, on the internet, arguing with people as equally lonely as themselves. The winners of these arguments are the saddest people in the world, though at least the occasional win convinces them the extra time spent was worth it. 

Infrequent moments come up, the kind of things that could force them out of this comfortable life. They rarely pick up on the fact that they are in a relationship and that they need to do things differently. Without this self-awareness they remain oblivious to the world outside of their world, hermetic in their interests and never choosing to go outside. 

The Grind Theory - The Grind Theory EP

The Grind Theory EP is pure aural hedonism. Embracing the physicality that all good EDM has, the songs are dominating wonderful pieces that recall Daft Punk and Justice at the height of their powers. Vocals on the songs help to further emphasize the spirit of debauchery that permeates the entire collection. For these are songs that require volume for the sounds deserve to be as gigantic as possible, for they are meant to be felt as much as heard. 

Effortlessly combining pieces of jazz, funk, and dance he shows off his impressive skill in creating seductive grooves across the entire EP. By far the highlight of the EP is the elastic groove of “Kissing You”. The sound is reminiscent of Daft Punk’s “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger”. For this track The Grind Theory slows things down. Lyrics emphasize this effect, of how time appears to stand still for affection. A close second would be the Neon Indian glo-fi vibes of “Heart Beat”. For this track The Grind Theory dives deep into the sounds of the 80s, letting the piece unfurl naturally. It shows a slightly different side of The Grind Theory, one as comfortable with pop as it is with dance. “Heart Beat” itself has the sound of a perfect summer jam, the kind of thing that ought to be blasted in the heat of the night.

With a tremendous sense of pacing, The Grind Theory’s self-titled debut is full of infectious hooks, rhythms, and gleeful abandon. These are songs to lose oneself in. 

Kenny Fame - Soul of a Man (Volume 1)

Kenny Fame’s “Soul of a Man (Volume 1)” taps into the soul of the summer. With deeply hypnotic grooves these are pieces that possess such hot hot heat. Structurally sound the songs have a casual air to them. Vocals help to further emphasize this dreamy aesthetic. Bass lines are the heart of the album as everything revolves around them. Everything on here has a slightly funky vibe (alright, in some instances it is full-on) while updating the sound giving it a stripped down, raw feel. 

By far the highlight of the collection is the glistening work of “We Came To Play”. With a sound reminiscent of Daft Punk’s “Get Lucky” Kenny Fame includes a lyrical narrative into the song. The song itself has a slower tempo than that Daft Punk piece and greater introspection. An absolute blast of a song it shows off their impressive chops. “On The Subway” takes a more folk-orientated tact as Kenny Fame employs an observational lyrical style, a little slice of life celebrated by the relaxed atmosphere. The heat rises off the steady rhythm of “Broken Valentine” as the song takes on an almost reggae-tinged sound, right down the the percussion and the persistent bass. Airy in nature is the sweetness of “She’s a Runner”. 

“Soul of a Man (Volume 1)” displays Kenny Fame’s knack for combining memorable melodies with vibrant, physical grooves. It is a collection of pure joy. 

Monday, June 29, 2015

The Shabby Doll Reader by Various Artists

Parties were had in June with the help of Lucy K Shaw and Sarah Jean Alexander. They had their books come out. Additionally they showed up in the world’s cultural capital, Berlin, Germany, home to thousands of weirdo artist expats. Out of somewhere comes the theme of a triangle which is sort of the ‘mark’ of the readers involved. 

Mellow Pages closed. There is no reason to feel mellow about this event. Libraries have a special place in any community especially literary ones. People across the universe use libraries as ways to simply get free Wi-Fi. What made Mellow Pages extra-special was how they did more than that, way more. Readings, performances, strange happenings, these were things that occurred at Mellow Pages with stunning regularity. Individuals at Mellow Pages made it possible, the duo of Matt and Jacob busy doing everything in their power. Sadly the chapter of Mellow Pages Library is at an end and it ended far too soon. 

Of the duo Matt Nelson was the less Alaskan of the two. His book “An Apology for Apologies” came out this month and it is danged near perfect, like him. Small presses adored the joys that Mellow Pages brought to the world. Mellow Pages was big into supporting the small presses of the world, helping those small presses take their vitamins and find wonderful audiences. Doing anything takes time and money. The duo of Matt and Jacob spent a great deal of time trying to ensure everything was running smoothly. The feelings the duo of Matt and Jacob have left them wordless which is ironic as they ran Mellow Pages Library, a library with a plethora of books. 

Jacob Perkins faces people with a blown open casket. That is intense. Bathrooms require keys. Deep in bathrooms are pieces of waste, the embodiment of death via defecation. No fresh air exists inside of a bathroom, it is a law. Grey wipes the world away. It does it through concrete poured over the dirt poured over the grass. Nothing grows in grey. Words are saved in books, ready to be opened and freshened with every new pair of eyes. 

Matthew Bookin talks about Prozac. Far superior to the Anti-Zac, the medication that fucks over Zac, Prozac tells Zac what a good job he’s doing. That’s the problem with Prozac. It can gloss over more significant problems. Blankets go over the problems helping the problems feel warm, comfortable, and attended to. Of course with more Prozac comes more problems, just like more of everything brings. Problems usually occur with excess. Removing excess from life is a difficult if not downright impossible feat and to remove it takes a lifetime. 

Submissions to Shabby Doll House were done blind for their latest outing. This meant all members of the Shabby Doll House team had to read the pieces with blindfolds. Fortunately the blindfolds removed names. With this effort they were able to uncover new shiny writers. A roundtable discussion is a great reason to buy a rounded table, to counteract those crummy inferior square and rectangular tables. 

Kimmy Walters gives shape to life. Distraction is important. Writers distract themselves all the time, and some wonder how Kurt Vonnegut distracted himself from, well, everyone knows. Language is a difficult thing to fully express when people are trying for specific elements of style. People often like to keep their thoughts inside their head and to do otherwise can be troublesome indeed. 

Johnny Bryan gives birth to a baby poem. Poems are the babies of literature before they grow up to be big and strong stories. Lots of shout-outs are given in the baby poem that’s the sign of a good poem. The stars get the words sent from the Earth going to the heavens. 

Thus concludes another action-packed Shabby Doll House Reader. 

Sunday, June 28, 2015

Live My Lief Post-Review

Wow, I nailed that review of Live My Lief, like completely nailed it. I’m pretty happy about how the whole thing turned out. Sometimes when I write a review I want to make sure that I emphasize the parts I like the best through a complicated ‘riffing’ system. This stems from my obsessive interest in all things music. Music and literature to me at least have a lot in common. For whatever reason I try to replicate that experience making sure of a specific cadence, rhythm, and tone. Lots of people don’t get it, why I don’t bother comparing such and such writer to such and such other writer. Whenever I read those reviews I get the sense of somebody with a sense of insecurity, like they feel the need to show off how much they’ve read and to show exactly what tradition everything falls into. 

I enjoy the opposite. I want to know how a piece of literature feels rather than whatever specific history brought that literature to me. Honestly at this point a lot of what I read is modern, very modern, almost so modern that it simply breaks with tradition. That makes me enormously happy. With Internet Writing I get the sense that the writing is discovering new lands, the kinds of places writers only dreamed of inhabiting. Rules for Internet Writing (previously called “Alt Lit” a term I’ve been veering away from for fairly obvious reasons) are considerably different than any other kinds of literature. What came before informs what comes now but does not dictate a thing. I have read unfortunately precious few critiques of Internet Writing. To date the most advanced critiques have generally not gone beyond “it is bad” or “I could write like this” which in a way reminds me of the critiques thrown at lots of precious artistic movements outside of literature. 

To a large degree (at least to me) writing has oftentimes seemed to appear to be the most conservative of all artistic moments. Academia has specific writing guidelines, the whole “publish or perish” kind of thing, which makes writing even less accessible and helps to move it away from necessary experimentation. I know a few people who have followed this much more academic path and I hope that they are able to slowly change literature’s perception of being this monolithic, inaccessible thing to the public which is not a good stance to have. 

My basic belief is that writing should be accessible to all. Maybe that’s why I like Internet Writing, and writing like Steve Roggenbuck’s “Live My Lief” so much. I like Michael Hessel-Mial’s “Internet Poetry” and I like a lot of what I read on Facebook, because this is unrestricted and open to the public. Maybe the derision that is placed on a lot of Internet Writing comes from the fact that it seems so casual, so removed from any kind of guiding path. I hope one day that more people will engage in this Internet Writing and move away from the tendency to form writing cliques, rather to create a community that works together as a whole. I know that day is far off and probably won’t happen anytime soon, but I hope against hope that I can witness it at some point in my meager life.